As you may or may not know, Florida is kind of a special state. And by “special” I mean “weird.” (If you don’t believe me, google “weird news Florida 2013”. You’ll see what I mean…) Despite all the crazy shenanigans of some non-representative Floridians, I gotta say I love this state. (I mean, I grew up here, and I certainly like to think I turned out just fine.)
That being said, being here for the holidays is unlike any other place. Here are a few reasons why:
1. It’s hot.
I mean, duh, it’s Florida. But seriously, you guys, I really wish I had packed shorts. And more than 1 short-sleeved t-shirt. When I left California, it was pretty chilly, and I was driving through some really cold temperatures. Somehow it didn’t compute that my destination was gong to be so much warmer than my stops along the way. (Most of my readers are probably saying “Oh boo hoo” to me. And you’re right. I deserve it. But I am tired of being sweaty all the time.)
2. It’s humid.
My hair is poofy. It’s not cute.
3. It’s crowded.
It’s basically like I never left LA with all the traffic. In Florida you have “snowbirds” during the winter months, a.k.a. people who flock to the Sunshine State (ha! see my pun there?) to escape the colder temperatures pretty much everywhere else in the Northern Hemisphere. And there are a LOT of them. The roads are more crowded, the restaurants have much longer waits for a table, and don’t even try to find a parking space close to the mall entrance!
4. Floridians put Christmas lights on their boats. And then have numerous parades.
4a. We also put Christmas lights on palm trees. We still have Christmas trees inside like everybody else, but the outdoor holiday light displays often involve palm trees.
5. The local color is, well, colorful.
I was walking my dog in my dad’s neighborhood yesterday, when we happened upon a bottle-blonde mother-daughter duo powerwalking towards us. They were dressed in matching black tank tops and electric blue leggings, and one of them was pushing a stroller. I was too busy paying attention to my dog to realize that they were pushing a Maltese in the stroller until they were passing me. I REALLY wish I’d had my phone (or camera) with me so I could share this bizarre moment with you all. I don’t think Akela even realized there was a dog in the stroller because she didn’t bark or growl or even sniff at all. Literally 10 seconds later, we were passed by an older gentleman driving a golf cart with a giant fluffy poodle riding shotgun. Apparently the dogs here don’t have to walk. Geez.
And there you have it, folks. 5 (1/2) reasons why spending the holidays in South Florida with my family is never dull.